Saturday, January 04, 2014

The Real 'Alien' Prequel - CRASHLANDING - banned film idea

Woah, what was that?

I thought the Alien Franchise was for adults, oh well. I just got banned from the Prometheus 2 forum hosted by, for posting a series of scenes (that might (or might not) be in chronological order) for a REAL ALIEN PREQUEL, which Prometheus clearly wasn't, it 'seeming to be' a REBOOT or PARALLEL STORY of the entire 'alien' franchise. Oh, that was a very long sentence, but I'll leave it as-is.

Code-named CRASHLANDING, this pre-Alien pre-script treatment uses the art of Swiss artist H.R. Giger in as complete a visionary fashion as is artistically possible.

Weird how this ties in to my 'something got stolen' dream of this morning. Anyway, (and luckily) I made a back-up of the post - the first time I've ever done this, usually I just type away on forums and to Hell with the Mod Cons or 'moderator consequences'.

Here it is:

early script-ment

Scene: a naked sweating panting woman pleasures herself with her own hands, to orgasm. As the camera pulls away we see that the woman is built into and therefore controlling some massive section of Giger-like piston-pumping architecture.
Cut to a long shot of a steamy Giger-city, atmosphere and everything.
Cut to Giger Planet as viewed from orbit, thick atmosphere.
Cut back to close-up of the woman's face/shoulders, she's ready to start again, her eyes roll back inside her head as she strokes.

Scene: a(n Alien) Space Trucker pulls himself out of his Hyper Space seat like a Hermit Crab pulling itself out of a borrowed shell, but the seat seems to 'unplug' itself from the Space Trucker and allow exit. The Space Trucker's 'tail' splits and eight octopus-like tendril legs reveal themselves, suckers on the inside. A human female “Iv” runs up to “Vi” as he walks down the slope and hugs his lower body. We see that while Iv is 1.7m tall, Vi is FIVE METERS tall. Iv gets covered in tickling tentacles. Cut to:
Iv: Vi.
Vi: Iv. (his face looms over hers) You missed me?
Iv: Every time, Vi. What did you find this time. Show me, show me.
When Iv hugs him, he'll have 'beautiful skin' full of all sorts of 'texture' and 'colour' that change at her hug. That's his 'smile'.

Scene: A wall of rhythmically thrusting penises and vaginas. A wall of mewling babies. Two stages in the pre-life of these humanoids. One of these children is pulled pulled from the wall, or hatched, by its parents hands.
XenoNurse 1: Do you think this one will be a male?
XenoNurse 2: Who can tell at this age?
XenoNurse 1: Oh, this one's bleeding.
XenoNurse 2: Bleeding?
An alarm sounds.
XenoNurse 1: (holds it up) Look.
Cut to XenoNurses, carrying the newborn past the crèche where other babies, young children and other Xeno-nurses.

NOTE: all humanoid babies are brought up by XenoNurses, except Iv who is brought up by Vi. He's her hero.

Scene: a Satanic ritual ensues. White Robed Giants pull a small girl to bits on an altar. They carve her little body up like she's a frog on a biology student's slab. This is like the Mayan heart-ripping ritual, the girl's body is tossed onto heaps of other such ritualised bodies. Satan watches on.

Scene: naked men are chased by the FaceHuggers; it's like a Safari. Ritualise the chest-bursting moment. Out come more Xenos.

Scene: Vi is tortured for Satan's enjoyment, losing most of his 'oil'. His skin pulls back onto his bones and we get the classic Space Jockey (elephantine) look to Vi. Iv is watching, goading Satan on to torture more and more. This gets his approval.

NOTE: Both Male and Female humanoids have a role in this Space Society, both offer 'their bodies' to the 'biomechanoid machine' i.e. the whole planet, which is a ship in space. Parents starve their children to save them from having periods. It's about Human Commodity and Xeno Slavery. The females are bonded to Satan like ducklings, become Giger World. The males grow themselves to Massive Sculpture proportions to ward off Satan. Satan controls Giger World the way ENORMOUS viruses and microbes would, making the world from their own mutations. Play the whole film like it's a Financial Allegory of The Great Crash where faith in Satan fails and the whole 'market' falls to bits i.e. the Giger Planet, reverts to primal matter leaving only a Cancer Core behind it. But what sparks it off? Key Plot Phrase: “Xeno know they place.”

Scene: there's a rock-circled pool in Giger's art that I want to use as some sort of 'set' for the Muse of Satan, a special place where he bathes in the milk of dark oceans. Iv finds him there, bathes with him.

Scene: a Satanic ritual. White Robed Giants convince the diminutive females to commune with Satan and become buildings, ducting, steam-punk pistonry etc. They believe it to be their proud role.

Scene: Iv lures Satan out of his Vow of Celibacy to lure his enormous powers of world destruction. It's all explained in the Giger paintings – note to mention the Five Enemies who also need murdering for Iv's betrayal of Satan to work.

Scene: Iv has a brass locket that contains the GIGER LIFE CYCLE inscribed in it.

Scene: kneeling female with her mouth open. Satan approaches, looks like Cthulhu, facial tendrils take her face and pulls her gaping face to his. White fluid pours out of Satan's mouth into hers, pouring down her throat and spilling over her chin. She puts her hands to her mouth to keep the fluid in. Her skin changes, hardens. The lower limbs fuse. Then the upper limbs fuse to the torso. The bones falling into the centre. She becomes an egg, inside which a Facehugger twitches once.
Satan moves across to another kneeling acolyte, her mouth open.
Cut to Egg Cargo Chamber of the Derelict. Iv in the shot, overseeing Satan's act.
Cut to XenoNurses taking on the Five Enemies, mutated male humans, squirting them with acid etc.

Scene: as Giger World dies, the cities bubble and fall, structures rot and bubble and fizz, a tumbling of human females who've held it all together for so long, the blackness approaches the Derelict, into which the torture-shrunken Vic assumes his Hyper Space seat. A thumping at his chest. He just makes it into the seat and activates the Skymap and the Hyperspace gun as the black enshrouds the Derelict.
Cut to Iv: Satan help us if this cargo falls into the hands of a Warring Race.
Vi: A Warring Race would bring out the worst in Satan's spawn. But we have no other choice, Iv.
Iv: I love you, Vi.
Cut to Derelict implodes in a brief spark of light.
Cut to Derelict EIGHT MILLIMETERS above the terrain of LV-426, it hangs there for a while before landing with a massive crashing sound.
Cut to chestburster breaking through Vi's chest.
Cut to the initial view of Derelict in Alien; windswept, howling, haunted.

T H E   E N D

SUPPLEMENTAL: in fact, this arbitrary ban/delete got me so furious, it inspired me to resurrect the Jane Louxis identity and instal her into the latest draft of LIBERATOR (free planet novel #2). So angry did this petty act of censorship make me, I'm even going to 'borrow' scenes from the above scriptment to show how it could easily fit into an adult product with no worries about 'the kiddiwinkies reading it'. Or some mum being horrified that her kid might have read it on (kinda) thanks guys. You inspired me. Rrrrrgh!

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